Re: [UUPoly-L] Re: Evolution/Evolved

[Anita Wagner <imapolygirl@yahoo.com>]

On a more practical and poly-related note, many of us have likely
witnessed discussions in which the idea that we as polyamorists are
more highly evolved than monogamists.  I know some polyfolk who take
this position and make no apologies for it.  Certainly I believe that
in order to be good at polyamorous relationships, personal evolution,
(and yes, I use the term fairly loosely) via resolving insecurities
and self-doubt is advantageous.  But as a point of activist public
relations, we as a movement will benefit from all polys resisting the
urge to appear smug in our belief that we are somehow more supreme
beings than the rest of society.  

I'm probably preaching to the choir here considering the UU
principles to which we all subscribe.  Still I believe the point is
worth making.  I am admin for the cpnpolymono list, which is a
support list for polys with mono partners, and the mono partners
present often give valuable feedback.  One of the points they've made
is how much they resent it when their partners make the "poly is so
much better than monogamy because it's more highly evolved" argument.
 Even if it's true, making the point wins us neither friends nor
respect, and it's important to recognize that such resentment is
pretty much human nature.  

Just some food for thought.

Anita Wagner