Re: [UUPoly-L] UU Singles group ?

["Catherine Deville" <catdeville@cox.net>]

<<If a "singles group" is for people who do not
have any partners, then they  
are unlikely to be want partnered polys in the
group. ... 
 
If the "singles group" is for people who are open
to forming relationships,  
then partnered polys might be welcome, IF folks
understand polyamory. ...
 
OTOH, if the stated or unstated purpose of the
group is to allow each  member 
to shop for a monogamous spouse, then they are
unlikely to want any polys  
confusing the eligibility question. >>

This is precisely why I declined to attend the
Singletarians group at our Church when I was
invited to do so.  I found that at our church it's
more of an open social group than actually a
"singles" group, and folks in different and
transitional stages are welcome.  

Since I expect that most people attending a
"singles" group are indeed looking to socialize
with other unpartnered people in hopes of forming
a monogamous relationship, it feels inappropriate
to me to socialize in "singles" groups, as it can
easily lead to miscommunication of intent and
expectations. Which is what I explained to the
person who invited me to our Singles group.  That
person reiterated that I would be welcome, since
the group was not limited to singles but was open,
but also thanked me for behaving responsibly and
being considerate of the feelings of others. 

Never thirst,
Cat