Re: [UUPoly-L] UUCA Welcoming congregations

[mylionheart@hevanet.com]

Laura,
Welcome to the list, and thank you for your post (I mostly lurk here myself but
ocassionally 
chime in). It was thoughtful and honest and said something that I felt often needs to be
said 
in these conversations, that being that we don't want to demonize sex itself. Yes, some
poly 
people sleep around. Some people sleep around. The whole "it's all about the love" thing
kind 
of smacks of dishonesty to me sometimes. Monogamous people need to work at establishing 
and maintaining relationships with people, and they also love more than one person at a 
time, they just don't necessarily have sex with them. Or maybe they do. There's a long and

well established tradition in our culture, and in others too, that's involved in this very
thing. 
It's called "Dating". I've done it myself, sometimes with more than one person, and I'm
very 
far from alone in this, though I don't know how many of those people would go as far as to

say that they were poly. As long as nobody is being mislead, what exactly is the problem? 
Just to calrify; I do have many friends who are involved in committed long term
relationships 
(some married, some not) who do this too. Many of them would consider themselves 
polyamorous. Some people would say that they're "just sleeping around" by dating,
including 
some "poly" folks. Yet, how exactly are they supposed to find other relationships without 
doing this? How do most married people start off? 

Bear; 
I would also love to see that video! Please provide whatever info you can about it.
Thanks!

~Douglas