Re: [UUPoly-L] Too many circles, lines, triangles.....

["David VanHorn" <dvanhorn@microbrix.com>]

> 1. The practice of poly, swinging, etc. This would be the formal
> definitions, i. e. the Morning Glory Zell definition of poly which is
> roughly multiple, concurrent, consensual, sexual, loving, relationships.


I would even drop "sexual" from the list there. I don't see any requirement
that they be sexual though they certainly can be.  I have an intimate
relationship with J that used to be sexual, but we brought that to a close,
and we continue just as intimate, without being sexual.



> 2. Practioners of poly, etc. I think it is both vastly oversimplified
> and promotes poor critical thinking to talk about polys and swingers
> as if they were both homogenous groups and mutually exclusive.


Well, my wife and I belong to both communities, so by "white crow rule"...
:)
We know a swing and D/s couple who is looking to go poly.



> 3. The culture associated with or imagined with the practice. Some of
> us associate various cultural trappings with "polys", and I think
> this needs to be looked at objectively. It may be true that people
> who are science fiction fans, pagans, liberals, UU's, etc are often
> found in the poly community, but all these cultural attributes are
> not definitive of or necessary to the practice of polyamory. It is
> formally possible that someone could practice polyamory, ie have poly
> relationships and also be an adulterer, rapist, or even a Republican.


Hmm.. What's our net look like?
J married to D, OSO to L, married to me, oso to K, and me also to J

J          D         L            Me       K       J
Pagan, Pagan, christian, atheist, deist, Evangelical christian
+SF     +SF     -SF         +SF     +SF   -SF
Dem     Lib      Canadian  Cons   Lib     Lib


SF is how I first heard of poly (heinlein) but of course not by that name.
It seemed to me then, back in the 70's, that this is how things should be,
but I never expected it to actually be REAL.  Took way too long to discover
it. :(

Words of wisdom from popeye the sailor man: "I yam what I yam, and that's
all what I yam."
:)  It's so easy to get caught up in the labels, and attach all sorts of
meanings to them that aren't necessarily true for a given person.

In each direction it's a continuum, and all we can really hope to do is get
up a useful shorthand to express our preferences.