[UUPoly-L] Muncie?

["David VanHorn" <dvanhorn@microbrix.com>]

Anyone else on here from Muncie Indiana?

I have a bit of a situation that I want to discuss with someone..
My wife attends a different church locally, that I have big problems with.
Unfortunately, the minister there knows us, and I can't talk to him about
why I have problems there without potentially creating problems for my wife.

Some of the issues are poly, and I think I might have a better chance of a
"fair hearing"  from the UU side.  :)    It's complicated.

One thing that I found very disturbing that I will share here, at the end of
the service, the pastor invited everyone down front and said "Don't worry,
nobody's going to lay hands on you"... Well that lasted about a minute, and
he was laying hands on everyone he could reach, saying that we'd just have
to forgive him...

Personally, this bothers me a lot.  First, if I can't trust him to keep his
promises, then how can I trust him at all?   I didn't see that he asked
anyone before touching them, and the whole thing came off in a REALLY creepy
way to me..   If I can't trust him on something so seemingly trivial, then
how can I trust him not to take what I tell him about my situation and use
it against my wife?   Now he apparently wanted us to forgive him, being all
swept up in the moment and all, but he is in charge there, and it's nowhere
near his first time at bat.   Call me wrong on this, but I do hold ministers
or facilitators to the highest standards of behaviour.  What's his excuse?

Second, especially after HAI, touching someone without consent bothers me on
that level too.

The minister's talk was on "new beginnings", and I was so tempted to relate
the story of what happened to me this christmas, but it's VERY poly, and I
think I would just blow his fuses and get myself, and maybe my wife thrown
out. (WWJD?)


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