Re: [UUPoly-L] Acceptance, tolerance and liberalism

["Earth Father" <earthfather@cfnc.us>]

> -----Original Message-----
> From: David VanHorn
 
David--

It sounds like you had a rougher childhood than some, but plenty of privilege
as well.  You had both parents in the home, your dad had a steady job, you had
access to medical care, you had warm, dry housing, and you clearly picked up a
decent education somewhere.  Whatever racial/ethnic/??? conflicts you ran into,
would change when you moved-- so you didn't have to feel trapped in any one
situation.  

In fact, it sounds as if you wound up pretty resilient, which is true for many
military kids.  While many people think of moving around a lot as a
disadvantage, and some kids can't cope with it, most military kids I know
wouldn't trade that broad exposure to the world, and the opportunity to
re-invent yourself every couple of years, for anything!  As an Army brat
myself, I would consider that perhaps the strongest privilege of all.


> > As a teenager, were you followed by security people whenever you went into
> > an upscale store?
> 
> We followed them.  Pisses them off immensely.  :)

You had the choice to do that, of course; had you ignored them, they likely
would have paid no attention to you, I suspect.   Had a person of color tried
that, they might well have been banned from the store entirely--- or had goods
planted on them, and charged with shoplifting.

 
> > Does your family history go back only a few generations, because prior to
> > that,
> > your ancestors had their families broken up and sold separately?
> 
> 
> Nope, ours goes back about 6 to the days when famine and other forces
> displaced them from their homes.

And they were free to travel to another place where they could re-settle.  No
one took the children away from their parents, and sold the parents to
different owners in different states.   It is quite a privilege to have an
intact family heritage that goes back generations, with stories of how your
ancestors overcame various obstacles and met challenges.  A century and a half
ago, most of the kidnapped Africans in this country would simply be killed if
they tried to change their circumstances.  And there was the full force of the
law to back up the "owners".

 
> > Do certain people, especially those of a certain skin color, cross the
> > street to avoid walking near you, or give you an especially wide berth?

> Some sections of east LA, back allys of Kaohsiung, Different areas in
> Hawaii.

But not as a pervasive reality.  In most places, most of the time, you are
given deference, or at least the benefit of the doubt, because of your skin
color.

> > Did you ever hear other children being told that they can't play with you
> > because they weren't allowed to play with "your kind".
> 
> I was in first or second grade, (memory fuzzy) when I asked my teacher why
> my best friend and I were always picked last for games..  She said "You gots
> ta expec that if you're goin to hang around with that black child."   I
> decided then and there that NOBODY tells me who my friends are.

And it is a privilege to be able to make that choice-- a choice I and the other
members of my family made many times.  The black child you mentioned had *no*
choice.

> > Did you grow up being referred to by your race more often than by your
> > name?
> 
> Yeah..Haole. Fucking Haole. And more variants.

Experiencing such racial discrimination can be quite an education in itself.
Fortunately, you only had to deal with it in certain narrow contexts, and for a
few years.  You weren't subjected to that while on the military base, or in
most of the commercial areas of where you lived.

> > Did you have sufficient food as a child?
> 
> 
> Yes, though sometimes that's all we had. Dad was military, and away from
> home for as much as a year at a time. Sometimes only home for a few days
> between deployments. Military pay was slim pickings, and mom worked overtime
> to make ends meet.

Military life is a mixed bag.  The pay isn't great, but food, shelter, and
medical care are secure.  And every base I was ever on had extensive
recreational facilities for the kids, much of it free or subsidized.  That's
privilege.

> > Growing up, did you have a home, rather than living in a series of
> > shelters or being entirely homeless?
> 
> Military housing, changing every couple years at their convenience.
> Always shunned by the local kids, regardless of race.

That wasn't my experience, or that of my siblings-- or most of the other
military "brats" as well.  My older brothers, in particular, tended to be the
social leaders wherever they went.  I suspect this  something that varies from
person to person, and is not because of your ethnicity or other arbitrary,
unchangeable life circumstance.

> > Did you grow up hearing stories and seeing many pictures of people who had
> > been lynched simply because they had the same skin color as you?
> 
> Lynchings, no.  But go to the wrong beach in hawaii and see what happens.

So all you had to do was avoid certain beaches.  But there were plenty of
beaches you were allowed to go to, that were clean and safe.  That's privilege.

> > Are there active criminal organizations that do not hesitate to use
> > violence that have sworn hatred to anyone with your skin color?
 
> Well, I'm not sure what Farakahn and his bunch are up to these days, but
> assholes come in every color.

I couldn't agree with you more-- but murderous assholes are a different degree
of intimidation than people whom you've never met who simply don't like "your
kind".

> > David, if you answer "yes" to all of those, then I agree you were not very
> > privileged.  If you answered "no" to most of them, then you are among the
> > most privileged people on the planet, as well as in the US.

David, most of what you describe is similar to what my brothers and I
experienced growing up-- and I've spent enough time working with homeless
people, with inner-city kids, with civil rights groups and domestic violence
victims to recognize the extensive privilege that I have built my own life on.
It doesn't make me a bad person-- but it does make me a person of privilege.

Michael Rios

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