Re: [UUPoly-L] Poly reality

["Kelly Cookson" <kc62301@hotmail.com>]

> > I'm just trying to understand why polygamy is perceived as being more
> > exploitative than monogamy -- and why protections built into current
> > monogamy couldn't be extended to polygamy.

> > > That was my thought as well.  Most (all?) of the abuses that can occur
> > > in a polygamous marriage can occur in a monogamous marriage and are
> > > already covered by current laws, are they not?

> > > What new abuses are possible in a polygamous marriage that aren't
> > > covered under our existing laws?

Right now, if a man decides to marry a woman and set up a family in San 
Diego, and then decides to marry another woman and set up a family in New 
York city. Neither family knows about the other. This is illegal. It can 
cause emotional damage, legal complications, and possibly financial damage. 
If we legalize multi-partner marriage, the man can claim he is just 
practicing polygamy, since it would be legal to have more than one wife. 
This would require some new protection. Maybe a law saying you couldn't take 
on additional husbands or wives without at least notifying the other 
husbands and wives in advance. That's not something we have on the books.

Right now, if a man divorces his wife and leaves his kids, he might well get 
stuck with alimony payments and child support. But, if polygamy is legal, he 
a new option. He can simply marry another wife and go live with her. Because 
he's not divorced, he's not required to pay alimony or child support. The 
first wife could divorce him, but then he could claim he never wanted the 
divorce and he could retaliate by trying to get sole custody of the children 
(take the first wife's children away from her). He would have a better shot 
at doing so, since living in a home with two parents might be perceived as 
better than letting the children stay with the single parent. Should we pass 
a law saying that indiovudal income should be divided fairly among spouses? 
Or do we need divorce laws to handle situations involving multiple husbands 
and wives? Either way, we don't have the laws on the books.

Suppose a man cheats on his wife for many years. She discovers the affair 
and threatens to divorce him, leaving him with nothing. Before the divorce 
takes place, the man can marry the othe woman, claim his affair was just a 
courting period, and tell the court he doesn't want the divorce and is being 
treated unfairly. How can we prevent cheaters from getting last minute legal 
coverage? That's not a simple extension of existing laws.

But it's not just abuses. There are SO many other changes, too! Family law, 
divorce law, tax law, business law...a lot will have to change to accomodate 
multi-partner marriages.

My partner marries someone. I don't marry the person. (Or is that even a 
legal possibility?) That person signs up for a whole bunch of new credit 
cards and runs up $200,000 in debt. Am I legally protected from the debt of 
the spouse of my spouse? We don't know. We don't have laws covering this.

I'm an employer. I hire a guy who says he has 1 wife and 1 child. A month 
later, he has married two more wives (he was just waiting until he had a 
job). He now has 3 wives and 7 children. I tell him he will only get 
employee benefits (dental, medical, and so forth) for the first wife and any 
children genetically related to her. Can he sue me for benefits for the rest 
of his family? Can I charge him a different family rate for insurance than I 
charge the other employees who have only one wife? We don't know. No laws 
cover this sitiuation.

I'm married to a woman and have a child with her. She marries another woman 
without my approval. The woman has 3 children from previous marriages. I 
change my will to specifically say my inheritance should pass only to my own 
child. But after I die, the other children contest the will claiming they 
are legally my children, too, and so deserve part of my inheritance. Do 
they? Is my child just screwed down 1/4 of her or his inheritance? Or does 
inheritance in multipartner marriages follow genetic lines? We don't know. 
There are no laws covering this on the books.

Who can I claim on my tax forms? Shouldn't we have new forms for families 
with multiple married partners? And tax laws will have to modified to 
determine who gets what tax shelters or tax benefits on these forms.

We can create laws to cover all kinds of anticipated situations. But it's 
not just a matter of extending existing laws. It will require new laws that 
specify the problems and propose remedies (or sentences).

When I see the package of bills that reasonably attempts to protect the 
participants from abuses and to resolve a host of anticipated problems in 
family and business law, then I might support the legalization of 
multi-partner marriage. Until then, I don't support it.

:-)
Kelly

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