> How do you deal
>with "couples gifts" for your poly family and friends?
About three years ago I declared that I was buying only for my
children for Christmas and no one else. This cut some long
traditions of gift exchanging. It was the beginning of the best
holidays I've had in a long time. I've kept the tradition and the
holidays are so stress free. I put up my Charlie Brown Christmas
tree if I feel like it and maybe a few simple decorations from my
past. This year I actually wrote a letter remembering 2008 and sent
cards.....haven't done that for many years......may or may not do it
next year. The point is that I have no longer set up "have to do"
things for this season and thus removed all the stress.
My poly family/friends do not measure my love or commitment by
whether they receive gifts from me or not. Sometimes I remember
their birthdays and say "Happy Birthday" and yes, on occasion I've
forgotten; they still love me.
I'm like Valerie and her family. If there is something that makes me
think of the person and I'd like them to have it, I buy it and give
it to them for no reason.......just because I want to. When I went
to China I bought a gift for the wife of one of my partners and
nothing for him......I never saw something for him.
The major gift my poly family gives to each other is the gift of time
(the most precious gift we have IMNSHO) and the expense we budget to
see each other.