Re: [UUPoly-L] Good Monday Morning!

Anita Wagner <imapolygirl@yahoo.com> · Tue, 21 Oct 2008 22:16:49 -0000

We have a lot of work to do in working with reporters and daytime TV to be sure the "experts" they use really are experts.  I don't think they are willfully sabotaging us - they just don't get us, and it's not like suitable experts are easily located in the mainstream.  

A few weeks ago the Fox morning show "Mornings with Mike and Juliet" used a celebrity psychologist of sorts named Diana Kirchner who said that poly relationships are a train wreck waiting to happen.  (I wrote a blog post about it at 
http://practicalpolyamory.blogspot.com/2008/09/foxs-morning-show-with-mike-and-juliet.html ;).  I was bloody pissed that they gave this woman, who clearly knew nothing about open relationships, the last word, despite having begun the show by interviewing Jenny Block and that Jenny was still sitting right there.  Jenny said very good things.  Then they moved to a woman who wrote a book on how disastrous her open marriage was, and to a couple who had tried it but given it up as well.  At no time did they ask Jenny to respond to any of this.  

I accused them in the blog post of setting polyamory up and doing a hatchet job on it.  The show's host, Juliet Huddy, took me to task about that in comments to the post referenced above but I stuck tight to my critique in another post at 
http://practicalpolyamory.blogspot.com/2008/10/juliet-huddy-is-no-fan-of-mine.html

A number of us who work with the media were contacted by the producers of that show who were looking for poly couples to interview, and I think we need to start asking questions about who they plan to use as an expert and be able to offer up people.  Most of the time they'll take whoever is reasonably suitable and easily findable - they're very often working under a tight deadline.  

Not long after the Fox thing Tyra Banks did a program on poly where Jenny Block was the expert - it went a whole lot better.  My report on that one is at 
http://practicalpolyamory.blogspot.com/2008/10/open-marriage-on-tyra-banks.html

Anita

----- Original Message ----
From: K Kylev <sweetbinbi@gmail.com>
To: uupoly-l@uupa.org
Sent: Saturday, October 11, 2008 10:40:30 PM
Subject: Re: [UUPoly-L] Good Monday Morning!

Jasmine,

I quite understand.  No problem.  Your timing is perfect---whatever time
that may be:)

Your email was the first I have heard of Poly Pride.  Is it always the first
Saturday of October?

Oh yes, I wrote Harlan a couple of times and just got an email yesterday.  I
was interested in the concert but not feeling well and I just saw they have
cats and I am highly allergic, so I could not do that.

I have been working on starting a Poly group on the Eastside for
sometime---I  have listed on CL and some other local online lists and put
flayers up in the libraries, groceries and other retailers with bulletin
boards but have had a few to inquire but no one to show.  And, Seattle-CL is
notorious for flagging and removing..

Yes, those are good questions I should have thought of asking.  I was
certainly unprepared for the response I received, since the church is so
open about being supportive of ones sexual prerogative.  To me Poly is just
another relationship choice and certainly a positive family situation to my
way of thinking.  However, I felt like I was being put-off---that it was an
issue that did not want to be looked at.  Much like the Forum video that was
shown last Sunday morning where I, a visitor was the only one
present----"Struggle for Black Empowerment".  Have you seen the video?
Still, I trust UU will deal with the issues that disturb them, just as I
must with any I am shown---and as will the rest of the world in GOD'S
perfect time.

*Time Enough For Love* is my favorite.  However, I have not read *Moon is a
Harsh Mistress*, but I will be getting it soon since you have recommended
it.

Thank you so very much for your time.  You are very kind to communicate with
a stranger.

Hope you are having a wonderful weekend.

Goodnight.

Namaste
Kaylah

On Sat, Oct 11, 2008 at 7:39 AM, <JasmineGld@aol.com> wrote:

>
> Kayla, sorry for the delay, I came home to a very busy week at home, and
> barely got to my computer at all until today.
>
> > Was Poly Pride only in NYC?
>
>
> Poly Pride was organized in NYC. Other poly groups in other cities might
> have organized complimentary events, but I haven't heard about them this
> year.
>
> http://www.poly-nyc.com/pride.html
>
>
> > Are you a UUPA Trustee?  Have you ever been invited
> > to start a UUPA Chapter in the Seattle area?
>
> Yes, I am a UUPA trustee. Seattle has a UUPA chapter,
> Poly ForUUm of Greater Seattle
> http://www.uupa.org/chapters
>
> > Actually, several years ago I  talked to the Pastor and Assistant Pastor
> > letting them know I was  interested in connecting up with those who were
> > pro-poly.  I was  told that they were only interested in their
> congregants
> > spiritual life  so they had no idea of such interest and since this was a
> > very  conservative wealthy area
>
> A curious response from a minister, since relationships are an integral
>  part
> of a person's spiritual life -- as clearly demonstrated by wedding
> celebrations in churches. If the topic comes up again, maybe you can be
> prepared  with
> a few questions for the ministers, such as, "Have you ever known someone to
> struggle with spiritual implications of a relationship difficulty or a
> relationship choice? Can you imagine a person in a poly relationship having
> a
> similar type of spiritual implication with their relationships?"
>
>
> > Also, were you or any others familiar with any
> > of the books I sent links on Friday?
>
> I have read _Time Enough for Love_ several times. _Moon is a Harsh
>  Mistress_
> is one of my favorite books.
>
> Jasmine
>
>
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