Re: [UUPoly-L] UUPoly-L Digest, Vol 58, Issue 4

["Joelle O'Bryan" <finian0178@yahoo.com>]

Christine, I had a marriage break up for just these kinds of reasons, well in part. We had just a few simple rules for how we understood our polyamory and my ex managed to break 2 (tell the partner before the rumor mill does and use protection) with the same woman twice in the same weekend, while managing to hurt a good friend of both my (at the time) secondary partner and myself. Our relationship was floundering, almost dead, and while my secondary partner was trying to council my ex to what he needed to do to save our relationship, he just continued to break our rules

love & light

Joelle

--- Christine Heinsohn <kb4wyr@fhrd.net> schrieb am Di, 14.7.2009:

Von: Christine Heinsohn <kb4wyr@fhrd.net>
Betreff: Re: [UUPoly-L] UUPoly-L Digest, Vol 58, Issue 4
An: uupoly-l@uupa.org
Datum: Dienstag, 14. Juli 2009, 23:56

One other thing, I have often seen people use the concept of polyamory to explain away their inability to relate well to others.  Rather than work on relationship issues they have multiple relationships which while sex is included they don't often have much depth.  When concerns about rude behavior or poor communication arise, they blame the person with the relationship concerns for not "understanding polyamory".  I have found that those people who are most respected in the polyamory community are those who can maintain rich deep relationships and who deal directly with relationship issues.  They take relating very seriously, they don't see relationships as toys.

Christine